Early in my healing journey I was having some internal battles that were really affecting my moods, interactions with others, and my productivity. I was really struggling to decide what to do with it.
Do I ride the wave and wait for it to pass? Or do I walk through the mud and push through to the other side?
I knew I was experiencing the very thing that I help others do. I recognized that I was in need of a little self-coaching.
I decided I needed some time alone in nature to process. So I went for a stroll at our local park. This is a very beautiful natural park with two sides to it – the nice clean easy side, and the swampy side. Both are nice, but the swampy side has some amazing beauty that you can only see if you’re willing to go through some muddy environments.
As I was walking to a bench at the very back of the park, far away from the traffic noise and other visitors to rest, I noticed the ground which looked like solid grass was getting very soft. As I progressed, it got very squishy, wet, and slippery. Then as I took another step I realized my foot was going to get immersed in the muddy ground if I kept going.
I had to decide.. do I keep pushing through to get to where I want to be even though it might get ugly? Or do I turn back and go the easy way to another area and sacrifice being where I wanted to be?
I looked around… my heart pulled… I REALLY wanted to get to that bench because it was the best spot for what I needed. But I didn’t know exactly how bad it was going to get between where I was and the bench.
Carefully and thoughtfully, I took the step.
Then another.
And another.
One step at a time, with careful precision in each step I made it to the bench.
When I got there my heart was full and the beauty was exquisite – serene and solitary. My time there was filled with spiritual renewal and connection. I had time to think and process and decompress.
I had time to decide what I wanted to do with my mess in my life.
Then when I was ready to leave I had another journey to make.. through more mud to cross the bridge and make my way out. Throughout this whole journey my shoes got a little mud on them, but in the end I was where I needed to be.
As I processed this I found it to be a lot like our journeys in life. Sometimes things get hard. They get ugly. They get slippery… And uncomfortable… And uncertain. But we have to make a choice to keep going or turn back. Push through the muck to get to where we want to be? Or give up and miss out..? Ultimately the choice is ours. But when something is important enough to us, we’re more willing to go through the mud and uncertainty to obtain it. And when embrace faith, your steps will be laid out in front of you, exactly where you need to step – one at at time.
What are you holding back from reaching because of the muddy ground and uncertainty?
Can you relate to this in any areas of your life?